Imogen Jones, Witch pointedhat wrote in memebells
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506. well, that's embarrassing.
THE FAIL MEME
 



Because sometimes, characters are stupid, weird, embarrassing and clumsy. Just like us.
Post a blank comment with your characters name, canon and preferences. Responders roll 1-3 for general categories and 1-4 for more specific scenes. Play nice and have fun! A few things below the cut may be NSFW.


General Fail

1) Stuck. Why were you trying to get in through that window? Alternatively, how did you get your head stuck between those railings? Or perhaps more simply, your shoelaces have caught on something and now you’re trying to get away without alerting anyone to the fact that you quite literally can’t walk across a flat surface without doing something ridiculous and inelegant. Whatever you’ve done, you’re stuck in one place.
2) Clumsy. Oh no. What did you just break? A one-of-a-kind vase? Your friend’s favourite possession? Quick, just…put it back together and pray no one notices.
3) Saying What You Mean. This one can go two ways. For example, either you’ve tried to say something about your cat being out in the rain and instead blurted something about your wet pussy, or you’ve finally let it slip to the person that you secretly hate that you secretly hate them. Whether you’ve said something that sounds wrong or you’ve said something very true but very uncomfortable, it’s now exceedingly awkward.
4) Trip. Exactly what it says on the tin. Maybe you were trying to look cool, but you’re now flat on your face. Strangers are probably trying not to laugh. Anything you were carrying is all over the floor. Well done, genius.
 
Dating Fail

1) Late. Oh God. You spent so much time on your hair- or your pet/child/friend was making a fuss- you had to save the world- you were stuck in a different country- well, your excuses don’t matter. You are horribly, pathetically late. Better make this explanation good.
2) The Wrong Moment. Time to dive in for that kiss. Except you got their hair in your mouth, or they sneezed, or they just turned away. Maybe you bottled it and are pretending you were just leaning in to- to look at their eyes. Yeah. That’s not weird or anything, right?
3) Babbling. “Well, it’s so great to be out on a date since I’ve been so miserable since my fish died- not that I was too attached to my fish or anything, ahaha, yeah, no, but I did like her, I mean, you know, she was a pet, I think she was female, how do you tell if a fish is female or not I wonder, I never knew, I just trusted the guy in the pet shop…” You’re far too nervous to stop talking. Alternatively, if your character is more prone to silence, they’re too on edge to speak a word. Perhaps they’ve gotten a few monosyllabic things out- or perhaps they’re just smiling, nodding and dying inside.
4) The Bad Line. The bad: ‘Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’ The weird: ‘You…are like a…gorgeous…orange.’ Alternatively, you’re staring into your date’s eyes and the mood is almost impossibly romantic, and all you can think to say is, ‘Nice weather, isn’t it?’

Sex Fail.

1) Can’t Do It. Either you can’t perform, or you just can’t reach orgasm, and it’s frustrating and embarrassing for both of you.
2) That’s Not Sexy. You’ve got ideas about tonight- a surprise for your lover. You’re going to wear this and do that and it’s going to be great. The trouble is, your partner isn’t into exactly the same things, and your attempts to be sexy are met with terror, blind incomprehension, or laughter.
3) Sex Injury. You’re trying out a new position, or maybe you’re well-practiced at this but very enthusiastic. However, this time, it is not to be. Maybe you’ve fallen off the bed, sprained something, your jaw, broken the desk you were bent over and gone down with it...
4) Vocalisations. Either you just failed badly at dirty talk, you yelled the wrong person’s name, or you’re being so loud that the neighbours decide to shout at you to shut up through the wall. Maybe your mother’s downstairs and you didn’t realise. Maybe you squeak embarrassingly when a certain place is touched. In some way, you’ve said something bizarre or made some kind of weird noise during sex, and everything is now very embarrassing.

Kotetsu T. Kaburagi | Tiger and Bunny | no smut plz

[Just another day in the life.]

1:1?

{it was a vent. A tiny, tiny vent. It was how she'd gotten into the building and how she'd planned on getting out. Except... well, she still wasn't sure if he was there to help her or try to stop her but the point remained that a very confusing game of chase through the vent system had left her a little lost and...

Trying to wiggle her shoulders, she hissed:}


Just how stuck are you?

oh god. YES.

Ah...depends?

["Depends" meaning "very stuck". Maybe he should've just taken the elevator instead or let Bunny deal with this, but no, he just had to charge right in again. And now he's stuck in the air vents. It does not help that he's in his mecha suit, either, because now he's very limited in terms of movement.]

XD!

Depends on what...?

{was that the struts of the vent groaning? Did they normally do that? Blowing hair out of her face, she tried to wiggle around a bit more. She still had a bit of room if she didn't push it - or inhale too deeply - but he was also blocking the main vent with his very bulky... armor thingy.

...

who wore armor thingies when they were sneaking through vents?}

and the sad thing is, this is normal for him. SIGH.

Ah...well, I ran out of power a few minutes earlier. We're going to have to wait an hour or so before I can get us out of here.

[Actually they're just going to wait, what, fifty minutes? Still a rather long time, anyway.

...wait, is the vent groaning? O-Oh, jeez, that does not sound good. He definitely shouldn't have gone in with his armor on.]

the best ones are the ones that never learn

{have some squinted eyes, Tiger. You're kidding her. Right? Because the look on her face says it would be safer for you if you were. She's a polite terrorist - ex-terrorist - whatever! - however so she's going to make sure she heard right.}

You're going to be blocking my only way out of here for another hour?

So true.

More or less.

[He squirms a little, but all it does is get him into a more uncomfortable position than before. Jeez, these vents really are tiny. How did those people in all those action movies manage to fit?]

{well, for one, they don't wear their body armor when they're sneaking through vents.

And for two - well, okay. There's no two. These vents are really small. Whoever the building designers were, they certainly weren't the same ones that designed the Shinra tower.

More to the point though, how's she supposed to not only get herself out of here but him too? Because now that they're stuck together, it's not as if she can just cut out and leave him.

That's not a head bang. That's just Tifa... resting her forehead against the floor of the air vent. So it muffles her voice a little when she doesn't raise her head before asking:}


You can't get out of your armor in here, can you?

?

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